COME AND GO.

Dear Josh,

Hi, I know it’s too late for me to give you words of encouragement to fight and survive the cancer, a pat on the back, or a hug to comfort you from all the pain you’ve been going through because of your tedious medications. You’ve battled a good fight at such a young age. I admire you for that. You’re one of the most promising people I’ve known and I’m so glad to be your friend.

I will never forget you. Those days that we played hide and seek in the “haunted” house of Marnique in Meycauayan with Ate Raquel, Mej and the whole gang. I remember us being stuck in this room together and we were trying to scare you  because we turned all of the lights off. Those days that you visited me in the house with Marnique to ask me to come with you guys on yet another adventure. Those days that we swam in the pool in Arcadia until our skin turned wrinkled and ugly. That day we tried to take pictures underwater yet you refused to open your eyes because you didn’t want your eyes to turn red. That day we visited your house in Valle to watch Tropic Thunder and you guys told me it’s scary.. That day we watched Skins with Mej. That day when you welcomed me, Mej and John into your condominium to have my birthday salubong when I first came back from Dubai. That day when we played foosball. That day when you gave me the book “We the Living by Ayn Rand” as a gift for my birthday—until this day I haven’t finished reading it, that was almost 3 years ago. Shame on me. Those days we chat on Skype until 5 am your time and talking about anything under the sun. Those articles that you made me read and came a day I couldn’t read them anymore. I loved the fact that you try to get me updated on the issues that should be given attention yet being set aside by the Government and the Society. That one time we had a chance to Skype but then you didn’t turn your video on so I can’t see you, you were still in the hospital undergoing treatments. I knew you were tired that time. The chemo has taken its toll on you.

I was enlightened when I saw that recent post from you that says your WBC count went down. I thought it was a start of your full recovery.

I hope you lived. I hope you survived. But then, if you’re too tired and it’s just too much pain to handle… I don’t know. I really hoped you lived.

I’ve been crying.. Sorry for myself because, even if I wasn’t as close as I think we are, I lacked the support that could lift your spirit up. I was too far to visit you even one time at the hospital. I have planned to do so when I came home but I failed to make time. Heck! 

I love you, Joshua. You’re such a dear friend, close to being a brother because the Del Rosario clan has already adopted you. I’ll miss you dearly. Thank you for all the good memories. You will never be forgotten.

Goodbye, my playmate, my friend, my little brother. Hope you’ve found peace wherever you are. I’ll pay a visit wherever your ashes will be placed when I come back in Manila. I’ll finish the book and tell you what I think about it. </3

Sincerely, 

Chezca